Who?

You’re gazing in the mirror and what do you see?

You’re seeing a person other than you.

You blink. You look again.

And yet again you see a person other than you.

You see a person that hasn’t been shaped by you.

A person shaped by hidden secrets and rumors about you.

Old and new. Good and bad.

You stop staring at this somebody, that you don’t know.

You cast your eyes away and seal the doors on every mirror you see, that shows a person,

a person other than you.

You go back to bed.

To sleep, to remember and dream of what you did on that single day

Or at the remembrance of you past.

Just to rise once again.

And stare in a mirror.

Looking at a person.

That’s not you.

You wonder who it is.

But yet again,

you still don’t know

Who is who.

Advertisements

3 responses to “Who?

  1. Wow.
    It’s…. blue! At first I thought I had highlighted the whole page….
    Anyways, first I should say that I like this poem; it really makes you think. It’s like the meaning of life in one poem.
    So the only things I notice are a grammar thing and what looks like a typo. At line 9, I’m not sure I understand what it’s saying; I don’t know, maybe I’m just tired or something. Perhaps you could try adding commas in there to make it a little easier to understand. Or it might be that cast and shutting aren’t in the same tense, maybe that’s what’s tripping me up. If shutting is the wrong tense, then maybe change it to shut, because that would make sense also. I’m not sure; there are a lot of things you could change, but most of them would change the meaning of the line.
    The other thing is that, on line 6, there is a random b in there, so you might want to fix that.
    Other than that I don’t see anything wrong. It’s a very well-written poem in my opinion. Great job! 🙂

  2. Well hello there Dubstep,
    I like this poem oh so very much, it is very deep man oh so very deep. So deep… blood is drawn…. Anyways, it was utterly amazing and very sincere. I wouldn’t really change much but I really like that it gets more abrupt towards the end. Fantamastic.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s